Thursday, 24 October 2013

Oh dear, village politics ............

We have now been living in Uzumlu for just over 18 months and call me naive or even stupid, but the fact that there are ex-pat 'village politics' has only recently come to my attention. Apparently the village is rife with gossip and ill will, with people falling into groups who support each other and hang out together and never the twain shall meet.

In a psychological sense gossip is a natural human occupation, stemming from our ability to communicate and our need for social bonding. In fact around two thirds of conversations are based on talking about other people absent from the conversation, and are often judgemental and negative in content.

Back in the UK I managed staff and I learnt very early on not to rush in on the say so of an individual's version of an event. This being for two main reasons. Firstly because often the story was not told directly from the person originally involved and when stories are passed along the line they tend to become somewhat embellished and changed along the way. Secondly because different people do tend to perceive the same situation in a different way. The old adage "Two sides to a story" is so often proved to be correct. Often when the other perspective is pointed out, someone can feel differently about something.

Personally I am not interested in gossip. I don't believe most of it anyway. I like who I like and that is my choice. I also will go where I want because that is my choice. I don't expect anyone to dismiss me because I have been known to talk to someone on their dislike list. I don't expect to not be welcome in places because it is known that I have been elsewhere or talked to someone who doesn't go there.

Because we are busy and because of budgetary restraints, we very rarely go out. However, when we do we will continue to go where we feel like going and talk to whom we wish to talk to. Not everyone gets along with everyone else, I understand that. But I'm not interested in anyone's opinions on someone or somewhere else. I make my own choices, based on my own experiences.

Although it doesn't involve me personally, I still find it a terrible shame that anyone lucky enough to live in this beautiful place, could even have the time to care what other people are doing. I don't!

2 comments:

  1. Add a large measure of wine and beer and stand back and be glad you didn't get involved.

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